Friday, February 27, 2009

Ten Second Epic Ruled

I need a distraction, I need to find another way to write a killer blog and make money. I need a faster car. I need to start selling drugs to make ends meet. I need to drop a bomb on this city. I wish I was God, Fuck!
No fucking money and it's so cold I have become suicidal. One of my personal fares gave me a great story. The Columbus Blue Jackets were in town to play the Oilers. We kicked ass I'm sure. Well during his visit Jared Bowl was sad and lonely and he met up with this one client of mine. Now she isn't one of those girls, but when he threw her his digits she just couldn't resist. She called him and a few minutes later found herself drinking with some friends and a bunch of hockey players. SO she shoots a couple back and out of nowhere Jared Bowl throws her into a closet where she gives him a blow job and he fucks the shit out of her. I asked "was he any good?" She said "I don't know I was too drunk." Well I'm happy she remembered that much it was a good story. She's hot too, I always wonder why she's single. I can't fucking stand hockey players. Maybe because I'm out pushing hack for jack shit and the kid not only makes a shit load of cash a year but all he has to do is toss his number on a bar to score. Life.
The York, fucking York Hotel, I recommend it to any new comers to Edmonton. It's a first class Hotel. Close to downtown and all the amenities, including the cop shop. So I pick up a fine couple there. Mr.Morrison and a whore. Ugly manly whore, but Mr. Morrison digs it. I drive them to a liquor store on Stony Plain Rd. They both get out to buy the booze. On the way back they need to stop into Brados (another classy west end joint). When they finally came back Mr.Morrison had this to say "J" that's what he called me "J, have you ever had to hang the rat out a bit?" I said "yes" paused "don't we all?" Then Morrison said "well have you ever had a pip squeak pop out the other side while you were pushing." I said "sure it could happen to the best of us." Then he told me "I didn't even realize what was happening till the sucker started to stretch the cotton." Fuck Mr.Morrison shit his pants. The whore kept laughing, I'm guessing she couldn't wait for the rim job she was destined to do when the beer is done. I'm awful, but I'm the best.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i have a sneaking suspicion she's single because she blows/fucks hockey players in closets......

taxitalk said...

No I don't thinks she does. This was not a part of her character. I hope she's ok. SHe is a really cool woman. tough as nails.