Sunday, November 30, 2008

I have no friends and only socialize at work, sad or what? I also listen to a lot of Radio, I fucking love the radio

Just because you're 40 doesn't mean you ain't sexy, just because your 30 don't mean your old. When you're 26 though you should know better then to talk to strangers in the middle of the night. I am a guy and with that come many vices. Women know how to work me. I don't play the ladies while driving cause I'm at work but that doesn't mean I don't want to. I haven't yet. Its been a while since I broke up with my babies mama. We still love each other just in separate beds. So there are women out there that might be able to penetrate my little cabbie heart. Tonight there was a couple, two stuck out like sore thumbs, they were on white ave they got in and had no money, I took them home for free. Then at 4am while most of the city was sleeping I got a call on my cell phone. Ashley, she gave me the address, I gunned it. When I got there I realized I was going to drive a chick with no money, one of them got in, she had 10$, she lived across town, I drove her. I told her the next time she calls me for a ride to "take care of me". People sometimes think I mean something dirty when I say that but what I mean is I want cash, Hard, Cold cash, No blow Jobs just money so I can feed myself and my Sun. This is such a good job and tonight was great. I was invited into a ladies house, she wanted me to type in the URL to the blog. I did it I was nervous going into someones house but I did it, she was a sweet women and she tipped me beyond good, I hope she calls me back one day. There were lots of sweet people last night, I can't wait to get back up tomorrow and do it all over again.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Help me Jesus, I'm having problems with the door lock

I was an asshole to a guy on Whyte ave last night, he got in at a Red light, I didn't want him. There were hundreds of people to choose from, I wanted my natural selection. He was a grizzly dude who had a bad ass written all over him. Tough. I didn't want him. I kicked him out and picked up a couple, hipsters. They told me that Edmonton has a very cultural scene. Compared to where they're from. Ontario. Small town next to the big T. They told me Edmonton is open mined. I gotta open my mind even more. Fuck. God, this change in the economy, I'm feeling it. The people are there, but man the people are tightening up. The streets are aaa, warm. I want to describe the difference, from the begining of the boom, all the way to future. So it started with the whole Alberta has jobs. The East flocked to the west to make money, Alberta put out. Alberta is supporting everyone that made it in. The Bubble here has not burst, not yet. Finning laid off a bunch a people. No work. Less work, whatever. Two years ago houses made money, people were taking lots of taxis, and everyone was drunk. The music scene is flourishing in Edmonton, because of the boom. Now houses are worth less then what everyone new paid for them. There are lots of people who have 30 year 5000$/month mortgages here, but now there houses are worth 200,000$ bucks. things are gonna change once people can't just make a lot of money jerking off. I should shut my trap, cause I know I'm gonna be working more hours to get by, so Ill see all the shit unfold. Fuck there are more musicians during recessions. Good luck to us all. Cause the future is looking ... I don't know but I can't wait to see. Peace

Friday, November 28, 2008

obsessive compulsive for life

That last post left a scare. Tonight was a roll over, sweat lucky to be living alive. Sonic played the new Kings of Leon single. Nice. I was awful today kinda a bitch, I felt bloated for most of the shift. Sometimes I get stuck needing to go to the bathroom, or farting right before my fare gets in or flag flags me down. I don't fart in the car with others but I do fart. So do you. God not much to talk about drove real slow tonight, circled got some flags, and some decent trips. I met an artist, she was cool. Winter popped up, it was cold. You could see your breath. nice and easy.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Unlock all guns and bring your friends

Sunday nights are usually not very good, tonight was no exception, except for one thing. So I'm having trouble trying to scope out a decent flag anywhere. I pull up to On the Rocks and some fucking asshole cabby steals my spot. I move on to the next bar, Buddies. The king of gay bars in Edmonton right now. Three dudes get in. We drive one of them to his house right off of Jasper, he goes into his pad to pick up some cash. While he's out the two that are left talk about what's gonna happen. I heard one of the guys say "no fucking." Like most of my fares these guys though I was an awesome taxi driver. I let them smoke. The guy comes back from getting his wallet, they're all in the taxi. We're cruising up jasper toward the second and last address when Smells like teen Spirit turns on. The song is great I turn it up, and do a shoulder check to change lanes, turns out the guys started a party in the back seat without me even realizing it. The guy behind me had his face in another guys croch. The dude on the passenger side back seat was watching the sex act. I was blasting Nirvana. I kept my eyes on the road and listened to the song. All three were sucking each other off. It was so fucked up, the song just kept me moving forward, when it was done I turned it down. The Guy behind me asked if I was hard. I think he would have offered me a blow job if I had told him I was. I wasn't. I'm not gay. Tonight reassured me of that. Aaa, now I asked them "please don't make a mess". They were just fooling around waiting to do drugs and have a gay orgy. I've never had anything like this happen to me, and it shocked me at first, but Nirvana was on the radio, those boys got lucky, I let down my guard and for the rest of the time I made sure to put myself in a position that I would not have to do a shoulder check. That is a dirty story. I gave them the URL. They should comment.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

On the Rocks is where all the good girls go

Reading up on my old posts, I think the city has changed since I started driving the Cab. The rise and fall of an economy is far out, it transformed my world. My world is different then it was two or three years agofpr sure. I ride a wave of some serious freedom because of my elaborate, and provocative paste. My past is a way to jam myself into the lives of other. I'm the equivalent of a mmmmm social toothpick, and driving the taxi helps me act as a pipe cleaner. I've rubbed up against almost every walk of life that lives in this city. Rubbed up meaning I've shot the shit with a lot of people. Edmonton is seriously monotonous. I would like to drive somewhere more exotic, sometimes. I fucking love Edmonton though. It's my home town and because of this city I am who I am. The last time I left Canada I was 22 and I was only gone for like six months. Wisconsin. I want to drive away into the unknown, I want to be a rock star. Fame must be tough, I like making people like me, adapting to them. Sometimes you get people who kinda work like me, talk like me. It's weird lately people really enjoy the ride but I don't know what that means. I think it's the fact that I'm abrasive, I manage to embed myself into the cargoes life, its existence, I try to. Don't get me wrong people try to fight it, but I'm good at it, in the car at least. My driving might be a part of it, I hypnotize them with the ride itself. Definitely, I'm manipulative, but so is everyone. I'm just a Cabby.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Convenience bag for him and her


The weather was good tonight, I drove around, watched the night go by. At around 5am I accept a fare. West Edmonton Motor Inn. Its a great place, has all the nick knacks that make an Inn, in. I pull up and my fare is sitting in the lobby. That's strange. He gets in and tells me his address. North Side. Yellow head to 82nd street and North to 160 something ave. "You got money" I ask him. He say's "yes." I rarely ask people if they have money, I never ask to see it. I could smell the sent of a women, a street walker, it's a distinct ordure. Perfume and Booze, and drugs and sex, and ass that's the way it smells. The women cover it up and the men go off stinking like Whoore. Aaa. SO he gets in. We go. "What the fuck is up" I ask. "Man" he say's with a sad look on his face,"she took my truck." "Who" I ask. "This girl" he says "she was sweet." He outlines her body. "She took my car, she took my keys" he stops for a moment, "I told the Police, I told them that we met on 118ave". He puts his head down. He's still so loaded. I ask the killer question. "You got kids?". "An 11 year old boy and a 14 year old girl." he tells me. I laughed. I did, lots. I told him he picked up the devil. She took his truck to a dude that's gonna beat her up and feed her drugs for it. "how about the old lady" I ask. "My life is over" he says, "she'll never trust me" he hesitates "she's a good women." This guy was done there was no anger, only fear. He was still so drunk. He told me that he never slept with her. Lie, that was a lie, I could smell it, maybe all you have to do is kiss to stink like it, but I don't think so. The smell makes me sick, it's distinct, a melange of night "Live" treats, an organic stench, Aaa. He had to knock on the door, he needed to wake her up to get in. "It's all over" he kept saying. I told him he could lie, I also looked up into the sky from underneath my windshield and told him "it's all up to the big guy." I'm fucking awful. The dude was in a lose lose situation. That smell was going to give him away, he was just too drunk to understand that. That was a really great ride for me. I felt enlightened, prostitution, street walker stuff is not cool, it stinks. But wow it can fuck up the flow of things.
Sex. Drugs, Rock and Roll, I wounder if the ressesion is gonna trigger some good tunes
Oh and then there was this lady who was so done, boiled pink. Maybe drugged, SHe was in another taxi throwing up. He called an ambulance. The peramedic chick, was all tough and made me feel like a whimp for not just taking the drunk home, she said "Thats your job" to the driver that made the 911 call. The ambulace had special barf bags, they gave me a bunch "cool, if you have to spew? spew into this". The lady made it home safe.



There was also a kid that lost 6000$ playing baccarat he was 20 years old. Addiction. What an ass.

Friday, November 21, 2008

WHat are the chances?

The truth is I want someone to give me the same quality service that I give other people No a blow job is not included. Something that made me happy happened once again in the taxi. O.k so I'm creeping around the basic Jasper to 82ave routine, not making the cash because its becoming a typical slow Thursday night. Back and forth, no customers, it's nice gas is so cheap. The weather was bad tonight but actually it was good it just looked bad. I'm trying not to bitch about the fact that the whole world blows ass, when a voice in my head says's "chill, turn up the tunes it's not just about the money." Then I pull up to filthy M.cnasties on WHite, except I can't park right in front, and I want to cause I see the guitar player from Ten Second Epic. I make my way around the block and this time I park in front. Craig remembers me, and the bass player needed a ride. Sandy needed a ride to his pad on the east side, I talked a lot. The man was super cool. I actually remember looking at him one night, and then recognizing him on the bands website. They were super cool. That made my night. I had a good time from there on in. The money eventually came. Airport trip, an American man with a way of telling stories, it's the accent. I speak English, North America has several dialects. I like hearing diversity. Newphy and any kind. I like other languages so much and Alberta doesn't. Alberta assimilates culture. Edmonton is kind of like the Borg, but I got to drive a Rock Star and some crazy comet fell over us last night. There was also this girl who read my blog to me. I was embarassed but she also recorded herself singing ABBA, loud in the car, all her friends were singing it, loud. It was a fun trip, they wanted to be in the blog, I told them that they don't want to be in the blog cause it's dirty, but so were they. GOta love driving the Taxi.

I am a Polack too

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Someone saw my CBC thing on TV

Pick a pocket. The last fare I drove hated me, but she was one of only a few. I think I am a person that can be hated or liked. Some people are scary and some people are amazing. My clients are the best, tonight I had a few fares who called me back, thanks. I drove a rock band bus driver, and he was the coolest dude, I would drive a bus around the country, have bus driver stories. Rock Band Talk would be all around me. He was cool, he came from Georgia. That's the South. OK so tonight was awful fucking slow, the cash was coming in but with no flow, without a rhythm. I drove around cursing God out, asking him or her "Why you Bastard Jesus Why? Am I not a good man?" and BAM Jesus would shut me down with the Crack Head fare. A fare born to waste a cabbies time, so after he went into his parents house and took an awful long time, I went up and knocked, 65year old dad in a pair of tighty whites shows up to the door and pays the addicts fare. Both hands in the cookie jar. Lots of people in the city know me, or of me. It's a decent reputation I think. So driving around talking shit to the man upstairs when I get a fare, some dude, to work. As soon as I shut the meter off the machine beeps. Next, Casino Yellowhead Pokerroom, I tell the dude I'm dropping off at work that "the Casino is a wicked bad place, Devilish!" I get there some old man is smoking outside, I ask him if any other taxi picked anybody up. "I haven't been here that long" he says. I start talking shit about how the fare ditched me, and decided to stay and gamble "bastard" I grumble to myself. The man standing out side smoking tells me to go in and ask, "good service" he says. "I drove taxi for a long Time I know, go inside and ask who wants a taxi." I looked at the guy and said "OK" why not?, tonight was awful whats going into a Casino going to do. So I go and I enter a room filled with people gambling. It's 7 am I was starring at addiction, and every one in that room was looking at me.I hear some dude yell "Taxi". "Yep and I almost took off without you so hurry" I yell across a few dozen tables. When I left that Casino I thanked that ex Taxi driver. My fare was one of the few winners I've ever had the pleasure of driving. Winners are rare, I just want to mention that anybody who got in my taxi last night, you're a winner. The fare had thousands of dollars and after a great J-Cab ride he tipped me a 100$. The man upstairs works closely with the man downstairs, us in the middle we're just here for the ride, well I am. Are you?

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Global warming is real. I think.

THis is a corrupt and dirty world, but you gotta stick with it, it's the only place I have to live. I travel 350km a night, sometimes more. I wonder how far other taxi driver from all over the world travel. I wonder. My second last fare was a crazy group of crazy native people. I don't know if they were on drugs or not. They were out of the ordinary. One of them was psychotic and not one smelled like alcohol. You know what? They were fun. Ice rain and lots of cops not enough or too many. The same old same old super slow night. The people that I did drive were cool, some dude remembered me and by the sound of my voice. I remember lots of voices, can you use that in a court of law. I'm spending long periods of time in the car. It's kind of a wild place, a taxi cab. I wonder how long being a Taxi driver can last and if I stick with it I have to learn about other cities. Edmonton has a grid system, so it's easy. Edmonton is also really big. Edmonton. Canada! Calgary. Calgary? Is Calgary hard to figure out? Can you make $ in Calgary? I want to start a production company. In Canada. Cause soon it's going to be hot here like in Cali cause the west coast is falling into the ocean, fuck I'm done\Peace

Friday, November 14, 2008

THe World will end many will die but my kid is gonna survive for the new world

Kind of a sad Thursday. Slow, that's O.k, I survived which is good, and i have another battery for my cell phone. I got it from this fare, this chick I've driven in the past. Young and crazy, the kind of girls who can kind of scare you but it's cool. She gave me the battery, for the fare, if this battery holds charge for eight solid hours it would be a great accessory. She also let me charge my phone in her pad, Thanks. I've been blogging around town. The job, a strange bus driver dude, kinda crazy with a harmonica, he sang me somecazy stuff, I liked it, He said he wants to start a band, I told him "I do too." Who the fuck knows? Who the fuck cares? Ass long as the battery stays alive I'm on top of it. So many bad drivers, Taxi drivers are the worst. That's what happens when you run out of steam, you have a hard time keeping it in between the lines. I'm still brewing, got lots of spunk left but nowhere to spew it. Rock Band! I must start a Band. Fuck Ill drive everyone to practice. Practice then work so we need a lenient open minded place to Jam. I'm pumped gotta stay motivated, when the shit is going to hit the fan I'll be long fucking gone.



to Nowhere


Sunday, November 9, 2008

Lunatic in a Taxi

This is great stuff, too good. This was a crazy kid I could deal with, I'm not going to tell you what I got paid, fuck there is so much to be said about this one, mainly that it's something that made me laugh pretty good.

Sun Jet

In general the city is a great place to live. Hey it hasn't snowed yet and it's not freezing cold. Tonight it stayed above zero. The big bar, I had issues with it again this evening. The CFR is in town right now, Canadian Finals Rodeo. Big fucking deal, so most people flock to the Country bar, Oil City. Now the club is one thing but the traffic around it is another. The worst drivers are behind the wheel of the Taxis scooping Cowkids up. There was some seriously awful driving tonight. Oh and a big fucking Check Stop on Calgary trail, This time I got some pics for you people to see what a Check Stop looks like, there is kids out here in Alberta that do not even know they exist, decent policing seems to have been extinct over the last few years. Man people are good. Almost all people are good. Tonight was not as big a pay off as last night and that seems to effect the psyche of a person. Fuck I shouldn't worry about the pay off as long as I make it home to my little sun. I'm growing a winter beard. To stay warm as I'm sticking my face out the window. My car is my horse and the top light is my lasso, Yeeeee haw.



Very deep talk in the background, sometimes life is personal.

CBC PROMO

Saturday, November 8, 2008

I'm a Pomeranian

This was by far one of the better nights of my career. Good money in taxi, that is if you know how to work it. Tonight I picked up a group of girls celebrating their girlfriends passing, strange. It was the victims birthday today. The girls wanted to continue through this trying time with good memories of a life that was taken from them much to soon. Good for you ladies. So many fares tonight. I wounder who won the Womens World Boxing championship. Last night I drove the WBC Worlds Super Feather Weight, the lady competing for the title, her brother. Michael Scragg. Nice guy. He was documenting the whole event with a video camera, so I told him to start a blog. Fuck all you people with something to say should start one. I drove over 400km tonight, thank God gas is cheap. There is an abondance of ignorance here in Edmonton. The Oil City is a bad club the police are always there and people line up to get in like dirty retarded sheep. One of the worst things about the Oil City is the way the cops behave around it. They protect the club not the patrons. There should be something done about that club and all the clubs around it. The Bank aaaaaa so gross, if you can never go. There is one owner of all these clubs and this person is getting rich off the destruction of my city. That guy who owns those clubs should be 1. Put in jail (cause he is the creator of such and awful place) 2. be fined for all the destruction and police work he or she caused. 3. be ridiculed as the drug trafficking, booze pushing monkey that the guy really is. But he is getting rewarded with hundreds of clients that line up like animals. Gota love the Oil City shit house, some cop pointed his flash light in my eyes while I was dropping off a fare, he wanted me to move while the girl was still getting out. Fuck him, but because there is some RCMP out there that might actually read my blog I won't call him by the official barn Yard name. Sorry guys but if you can disrespect me and force me to deal with your inabilities as a department then I as an individual think that I have the right to mention to the public that The EPS are a bunch of wasted TAX dollars sometimes. This is an offensive post I have never actually tried to Police the City, I know nothing about it. And I'm guessing that actually working the Oil city is beyond a massive undertaking. And this young punk, kid who showed me a picture of his tall Cannabis plant said he had a hard time sneaking his pipe in, I should have asked how he got it in, sorry. Here is a couple of words to any one trying to flag a taxi at the Oil city, "Cross the Street."

Friday, November 7, 2008

Sonic 102.9

Stick it to the man. Just do it. Fuck! Yeah so tonight was beyond what I was expecting, I should never expect shit cause this job has some crazy highs and some powerful lows almost every couple hours and that's just cause of traffic. Traffic there is lots to traffic. Red lights, Green Lights, Yellow lights, Blue lites. Good people tonight. One guy with a great big bag of pills and cocaine. I looked at it, he showed to me after he payed the fare. He was an odd fellow. But not a bad fellow, well not yet. There is this girl who I think is really cool, shes tough and a bad addict she calls me lots and I pick her up when I can. She tried to push the shit, and she drown in it fast. Anyone know the York Hotel, Jasper Place is next, or whats worse the Transit? Who here is from Edmonton? I fucking love this city inside and out. Next A young dominatrix, hot! Actually two girls who were exotic but legit, real. We went to the McDonald's drive through two Big Mac meals, extra Big Mac sauce, and Coke. That's the same stuff I get. New City has dinner? Who knew? A military guy, except he didn't tell me he was in the military, hinted, subconsciously, I realized later, he was crazy but he could hide it. I was trying to figure him out the whole ride, his friend threw up three times on the way. Once on 100 ave and 163st on a lawn a block away from the 711 I picked him up at. No problems, then once on Fox drive and then once at the Union their final destination. That's when the crazy guy told me his going to Afghanistan. Who knew? That's cause I told you. Then I drove a girl to St Albert, I talked my ass off, about my life, my fucking awesome life. I love life, now here watch this






Or listen to this Vox HumaNa

or hey comment here sonic 102.9

Sunday, November 2, 2008

I see a sunny side, wait till it snows.

Holly shit was it chill tonight or what? Quiet, relaxed and I made enough dough to live another day. It was nice. I did my job. Somehow I manage to please everyone, from the high class to the no class, I'm both of those. Sad. Good, get it. I love this job so much. Hasn't been that bad, this week was busy but pleasurable. The police were working the streets. The Roads. Great, the drunks were out in full force. I wonder if it was hard to avoid the one check stop on Calgary trail. It was one of the first Check stops I've seen in two years. It was big. Got to love the life. Its been warm. Warm weather is an attitude, it's provocative and everyone knows that Edmonton is running on some south westerly winds, the cold is coming. But not this weekend. What a strange night.Slow and then fast, you know everyone partied last night, so the night progressed slowly. I hate that shit. I just cruise around slowly looking for a flag, anyone, a bum. Sometimes you can cruise for an hour. I move, shark like circle the waters. Groat road bridge river valley road, 116th street, 109st, high level, Saskatchewan drive, 105st , 82ave, and all over a million times. Love flags, and when everyone needs a Taxi, I choose. My choice, then we see who's the bum for real. Girls always get picked up first. Manners, boys. I pick up lots of dudes. Its a totally different event each fare. Fuck I'm the same fare. I had a good weekend, My last fare, was out there. A guy Ive driven, with his buddies women, Hunting circling to score, They called! this was no flag. Crack hungry but just starting, using the company credit card "still valid". Strange. The women, all I ever have to do, to reach in deep is say "Got Kids". Bang Almost always a Bulls eye. Crack heads are hard to define, but they are people. Just that they are always looking to score, and the women are always using sex to score, and the guys use the drugs to get some. Hunter man pays for food. It was my last fare, I have no radio in the car, no radio. Do you know how crazy you can go with no radio? You start singing to yourself.











I fucking called 911 again, but I saved the river valley single handily

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Who's Halloween was great? MINE!

Tonight was awesome and so were all my clients. The city was very well behaved. First off all the monsters, nurses, bikers, whores, dentists and ghosts and all that stuff in Edmonton out did themselves this Halloween weekend. I saw underwear lots of underwear. I'm sure many a thing went home to have a scary good time. Tonight was basically all business, good business. There were lots of Northside Trips aaaaa, but the people I drove were all so rocking that I hardly missed the fact that the stereo in my car is dead. There was an address I could not find, just up on Terwilliger drive, I don't have a new map and the road to the area was just paved I almost got stuck in the fresh pavement. Hahahah shitty joke, I'm gonna upload some clips for you guys to see, to all you great people out there, oh, there was a couple I have to write about. They were young the girl was from the American south, totally she was wild and the two of them (him and her) wanted to make it into the blog. She wanted to do something, I told her that it's gotta be fucked up to get on the blog, So she went down on her man. Well you see being put under such pressure and having had a few to many alcohol drinks the guy could not achieve aaa you know. It was a good reaction, Fear! Halloween? I thought that was sweet of them to try, for you readers out there. Oh and one of my personals a girl from England called me to pick her up at the UofA I told her I couldn't but she really wanted a ride. So I showed up and the women fucking ditched me, fuck what a no no. Later that night I saw her waiting for a taxi outside the Bus shelter, So sorry little lady wast my time then I'll watch you wast yours over and over again, some people don't know that I'm a gem, but many do and those I thank, because I love being able to serve and support great people. I swear I have a great clientele, and Edmonton does have a heart. Kiss Kiss Bite! Vampire...
Peace

THis was a good night, the city felt safe