Saturday, March 21, 2009

four legs and a gun good, two legs bad

Constable Napoleon is a worthless mother fucker. Him and Chief Snowball do nothing but jerk each other off. The whole time drunk drivers cruise around the city causing chaos the pigs just sit around and guzzle their mash laced with greed. I was almost killed dozens of times tonight. The first day of spring seems to have given birth to a world filled with drunk drivers and ignorant pigs. The writing on the barn wall is beginning to change and most of the animals have no idea because they put blind faith into the system that's run by swine. Oh and they're sheep. Pigs are brain workers, worthless apple eating pieces of shit that do nothing but sit there and ponder how unimportant their jobs are. The last I checked the law said drinking and driving is illegal, but last night I witnessed so much of the opposite that I think the rules changed. Our city is an awful dirty mess. I know it's hard for the people behind the law to understand but that's because they are ignorant rat bastards. The guys behind it all are the type of animal you just can't educate, they are wild. They are criminal. You are allowed to drink and drive in Edmonton Alberta. The bigger your truck is the faster you are allowed to move. I was thinking about how I can make the pigs understand that the streets are not being maintained. The only way I see it is, if someone gets real drunk gets in his truck and slams head on with a Pig cruiser. Maybe then the animals that watched the guy get in his truck and drive off will realize that it's not the drunks fault it's the systems. For creating a Police force of invalid cops. The only problem with that lesson is that you don't even see pigs on the road. The only thing that drunk asshole is destined to hit will be some poor innocent cabby trying to feed his family. He'll wind up dead, the drunk will survive. The Pig will pull up to the scene with his face covered in Pig Mash (Tim Horton's) and say "what a shame I just saw that drunk driving badly up the road but I was to lazy to give a shit because I fell asleep in the Farm House. Hahaha check stops are out of the question because they are just to much work. We don't prevent crime. Us pigs we salute criminals in the city." They do, that is until somebody runs into their families car, drunk, fuck who cares. We all go to Sugarcandy Mountain when we die.

4 comments:

Victoria Von Swarovski said...

Edmonton,
The dirtiest place in the world.
You know our syphillis outbreak is actually a national health concern now.
Don't pick up anything you don't know where it's been. Get my drift.
Might be giving you a ring tonight, taking quite a lot of people out for little sisters birthday.

Nicole said...

Yeah we have some issues with our cops like that around here too. Philly, for a long time, had the most murders per year in America. Not much was being done to stop it. It's still really bad.

My dad and boyfriend are going to Edmonton together in a few months. I'll tell them to keep an eye out for the drunkies.

Claudio said...

You are the best! ^_^

Laura said...

I agree.. spring sprung and so did asshole drivers.. i swear I had 3 ppl flip me off b/c i wasn't going fast enough for them on the 4 lanes.. I was already going 120 .. idiot hunting season