Monday, January 20, 2014

Or I guess I do.

"There needs to be a way we can settle this." His voice echoed, he always sounded like that, the other one's voice was always small and rusty. "Yeah, I know what we should do to figure out that they're all just a fallen breed" they both turn and look at me. "I think I know what you're saying!" he says, again voice booming, the little demon playing cards with him smiles.

The demon takes the deck and offers out a hand, I don't want it. I know what drawing a card will entail. I'm at their mercy, they get to gamble it all away. When I pull the card I'm not surprised to see what I got….
Bos… fuck the worst hand in the world… Fucking world..

I feel my self fall immediately it was awful and cold, I can remember screaming, and according to my mother that continued for a long time. I wet the bed too. ..
My first memory was that of my brother and I, we were fighting at our home. I must have been two or so years old. We were fighting over a gun. My mother scolded my brother for trying to take it away from me. I got to keep the gun, my brother hated me for it. I just smiled and waved..

Falling to the world to become a Bos was not my original objective when it came to existence. I'm a pawn in a game of cards. This is one of the most difficult roles I've ever been given because I don't generate the outcome based on my one view or through my own behaviours, they're just using me to watch what these folk down here are about to play out. I just happen to have the right perspective.

Seeing myself as a fallen creature is enough for God to know that the devil's going to have a hell of a time disguising himself or herself without me recognizing her…
I love her and she knows it, I'll find my gun, cause I'm growing up in this place, soon enough I'll die and be back at that card game.. or maybe not. I don't know...


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