I am a beer owned by the USA

To tell you guys the truth I'm pretty sure Canada burnt down a long time ago. We live in a shell of Canada. We live in the USA. Tonight was alright. No one was really wasted. I asked one guy "What do you do?" He looked at me and said "I give head." That was more or less most of the conversation. I had a group of kids that had just been robbed. Robbed meaning they left their purses in some dudes truck and the guy took off. They offered me their shirts to get them to the closest 711 I drove them for free. I drove a web guy and a welder. Lots of police out tonight. Probably because a few years ago rich, spoiled, and ugly Edmontonians rioted. The reason, we're a rich spoiled ugly and immature version of the United States of America. Whatever the fuck that means. Police presence helps business. It's still slow, but the web guy said hes still making great cash. The welder, well he paid me 60$ to drive him around for an hour. "Thank God". Really cool guy too, eccentric but not in that gay way, not that there is anything wrong with that. Traffic was unbelievable. People were everywhere. I wish I felt closer to the nation I grew up in but I don't. I feel like Canada has made an effort to turn itself into a first class duchebag. Yes Canada, you. You are run by a Conservative Government that is run by clowns and puppets. Our once great social health care system is being picked apart by the pigs with money and the government. Our infrastructure is falling apart. Oh and we look, sound and feel like Us.......A. Get it. Try not to be pissed with me try to make this nation better, and lets be honest we should have celebrated our Independence in two more days.